In Courage, I resisted the urge to back out the night before, using my oldest son, home on leave from the Navy as my reasonable and understandable excuse.
In Courage, after driving an hour and a half to the event and circling the block no less than 3 times once I got there, I talked myself out of turning around and going home when I got to the address of this home I'd never been to and there were no other cars parked and no indication that an event was about to be held here.
In Courage, I put on my best 'extroverted' smile, dug deep to find my best 'extroverted' personality, stepped out of the car and said 'Hi, I'm Tami'.
One might think I was going before a room of women to present myself for judgment and validation, feeling sure I would be the one standing alone, left out of the 'click' because I just didn't measure up. I wasn't...was I?
How ridiculous was my fear? After all, I was going to a meeting of other like minded women, put on by the founders of (in)courage, part of the Day Spring company. The event was called (in) real life ~ (in)RL ~ and the theme was 'community'. I should have been excited to meet women who read the same blogs I read and worship Jesus as I do. Instead, I was filled with insecurity and trepidation.
Why in the world did I sign up in the first place?
Psalm 143:8 ~
Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love,
for I have put my trust in You.
Show me the way I should go,
for to you I lift up my soul.
I just knew I was supposed to go.
When we come to God on a daily basis and start our day with this question "what do You want me to do today Lord", we also have to be ready to obey.
And so, I walked in the door with my plate of Mini Pecan Pie Muffins... dieing to self and living in Him. After almost a year of hiding and healing some deep wounds, I knew God had asked me to make this step so He could strengthen and encourage me for His purposes and His plans.
When my flesh is afraid, worried, intimidated.... If I am walking in obedience I just need to lift up my soul to Him and He will strengthen me for the journey.
And so my reward for obedience?
....Some new friends ~
...and new possibilities
I am sure and confident of this ~ my God does not do random things. He has a plan and is weaving a beautiful tapestry for His glory and our good.
The women I met on this predestined day had varied stories to tell of how they came to this one event, and all I could think about was 'why God...what are you weaving here?'.
I know it will take time for me to see the purpose for each thread of the tapestry. Threads that He purposefully chose to weave together on this day, at this home, at this time in our lives. I have time. I'll keep asking Him, 'what today Lord', and one day I'll stop and realize this particular tapestry is done and each one of the beautiful women in this picture above will be represented by their contributing threads.
Our recipe today is What Today Lord?
The ingredients are from Psalm 143:8
The directions are trust God completely, without question or hesitation. Step boldly in obedience, knowing His love is unfailing and He desires to show us the way to go.
CLICK HERE for a printable version of today's recipe for the soul. Make notes on it of how God is speaking to you today, and carry it with you to feed your soul as needed.
Father, I am blessed by Your daily, even minute by minute, care for me. Your word tells me...promises me...that You cherish me and desire good things for me. All I need to do is seek You, follow You and obey. Even if I obey 'scared'...You do not condemn my fear but replace it with strength and courage. And so, Lord, each day I come to you asking "what today Lord". Give me eyes to see Your leading and a heart ready to obey. Thank You Lord, for the blessings of obedience. Keep my eyes wide open to seeing even the smallest of blessings each and every day I follow Your lead. I trust You Lord. I'm lifting my soul up to You so You can fill me up, one day at a time. I come before You in the name of my Savior, Jesus Christ. Amen.
I shared this story at (in)courage.me about the (in)RL conference... so hop over and read the stories of others and be encouraged and inspired.
Specifically, I'd like to invite you to click over to the blogs of 4 of the new friends from the picture above...
Mary @ Mary Demuth, Live Uncaged (our host for the day!)
Tammy @ If Meadows Speak
Laura @ I Was Just Thinking...
Liz @ Deep Fragile Grace
Before you leave...I'd love to hear from you. Am I the only one that has such stuggles of intimidation or insecurity? I doubt it *grin*...and I know for sure we can be an encouragement to each other with some shared thoughts. Just click below!
Is it awful to admit that I'm glad to know I wasn't the only one who almost bailed, and for pretty much the same reasons you described above? I'm glad neither of us did so!ReplyDelete
Thank you for sharing your heart on this.
not awful...real *wink* Good to hear from you!Delete
You're definitely not alone. What I love is the peaceful feeling once I stop resisting and accept God's call and let his plan unfold. Why does it always take so long before I surrender though?ReplyDelete
Great question Lisa...why DOES it take so long! :-)Delete
We can only hope that each time we finally let go and do what we are being led to do we learn to trust a little more and don't wait so long the next time! I suppose that's part of sanctification ~ learning to obey faster and faster *grin*
Oh you are soooooooo not alone! What you are is an inspiration! I started to say that you wouldn't believe my start as a Homemade Gourmet Distributor (as we were called then), but I guess you would. After my first trip to a HG event in Texas, I knew I had made the right decision. You became my hero (can you call a lady a hero?) I was crushed when I got the news of the sell. I haven't recovered yet, but here you are inspiring me again. Still trying to figure out where I go from here, but feeling stronger each day that God will lead. Brenda SeymourReplyDelete
I'm so so so glad you came. I loved seeing you and I know God has great things in store, even when life can be hard. You are seen.ReplyDelete